Be Everything To Yourself First In The New Year

The last day in 2018. I hope you’ve had a good year and 2019 exceeds all your expectations.

 Let me as you this, do you attempt a fresh start in the New Year?

I’ve shifted away from New Years Resolutions over the past year. They never worked. So why fail when you can succeed, right?

Before getting into what I’m up to in 2019, you need a little back story first. So here we go. Yeeee!

 

 Christmas Day, my entire family woke up with a nasty head cold. Coughing, sneezing, and snot bombs everywhere. We were all exhausted but pulled through because these kids were excited to open presents. My husband and I were dying.

 

The day after, we made the 4 hour trip to  Peterborough, Ontario, this time, there was projectile vomit. We were 20 minutes away from our destination when My 14-month-old felt a little something in his tummy he needed to share with the world. And in our car. The stench still resonates and it’s been nearly a week.

 

 
We made it, I covered in formula which has exploded all over my lap just moments before my son’s vomit fest, rushing the kids out of the car, and my husband plowing through the crowd to get the baby in the tub.

 

 
My father-in-law with good intentions made jokes. In no mood for his humour, I gave him the look my kids get when they don’t do what I ask of them. He left me alone.

 

My husband and I continued to brave through. Our kids were having fun. Even the vomiting one. My husband and have low-grade fevers at this point.
 
That night was brutal. The 2 youngest were up on an hourly basis. Thankfully, these guys slept till 7:30 in the morning.
 
Another day of running around, visiting loved ones. Again, the kids were excited so the sleep deprivation didn’t bother them. I’m glad they were able to have a good time.

 

By 4pm, my husband and I were tapped out. Doing our best to keep up with the kids, trading the baby back and forth to give each other breaks long enough to collect ourselves. After dinner, we packed the kids up and went in our way. Our mental capacity to carry on a conversation was nonexistent.

 

After another awful night, I was like; nope, we’re done and going home. W loaded up the car and left for London. Another 4-hour drive of hell.

 

Emotionally and mentally, I had nothing left. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. It was like my brain turned itself off to the outside world so I could only focus on what’s important. The human beings I brought into this world.
 
I’m sure our sudden departure upset some of our loved ones. But after pushing through for days on end, I couldn’t do it anymore. I needed to put myself first and take care of my sick ass. Thinking of others was no longer an option.

 

Making everyone else happy when you’re feeling less than stellar, is unsustainable for extended periods. You will sacrifice something in order to please everyone else. Usually, it’s your own happiness or mental health.
 
And is it worth it when all you can spare is enough to get through for a couple hours?
 
No.

 

Is it worth the smile on your face so someone else can have a smile on theirs?

 

Duh, no.

You can’t be everything to everyone if you can be everything to yourself.

 

So why do we do this? Why do we, as women feel the need to overextend ourselves regular basis when we feel our sanity starting to wear thin?

 

During the holidays no less. Hustling around to get teachers gift and class baking. Driving around visiting family for three days straight. And my favourite, trying your best to make sure your kiddos are well behaved when they’re overstimulated AF.
Every year for the last 3 years, instead of making a resolution, I’ve said “this is my year”

 

Resolutions seem to lose steam after a few weeks anyway. Especially, when they’re unrealistic.

This has been more of a statement of what I want to accomplish in my business, and each year has been even better than the next.
 
But this statement is going to have a different meaning in 2019. I’m going to work on putting my needs first. I’m going to try to avoid overextending myself to make others happy. It backfires and goes unappreciated.
 
At the end of the day, we all need to take care of ourselves a little better. You’re worth putting in a little effort into your needs first.
 
Not so you can take care of everyone else. So you can take care of you. So I challenge you to take a different approach when planning out your goals for the upcoming year. Set an intention and give yourself a year to work on it. It’ll take some practice and there will be a few bumps along the way. but if you stay conscious of your set intention, you’ll see a shift right away. 

 Happy New Year my beautiful friend,

Terrell

 

Ready to maximize your postpartum lifting performance? Get my favourite barbell training strategies in my free Barbell Training For Pregnancy and Postpartum Strategy Guide. You will learn to minimize pelvic floor dysfunctions, and improve lifting power in both pregnancy and postpartum.